Grieving Through the Lens of Yoga: Processing Loss with Compassion and Intention

Life brings us moments of profound joy and also deep sorrow. Recently, I lost a dear friend, Lindsey, to suicide—a loss that has left me grappling with complex emotions. As a yogini and a student of yoga therapy and mental health, I feel compelled to share my journey through grief. My hope is that this reflection not only honors Lindsey’s memory but also offers guidance to others navigating similar losses.

A Loss That Challenges the Heart

Lindsey and I shared a deep connection, one that extended beyond words. We even had a code word: Mindset. When you combine our names—Missy and Lindsey—it becomes Mindsey. Change the “Y” to a “T,” and it transforms into Mindset. This word reminds me of our shared intention to grow, to support each other, and to face life with strength and positivity.

Her choice to leave this world has stirred a storm of emotions: sadness, confusion, and questions without answers. As someone devoted to the principles of yoga, I’m striving to process this loss in a way that is compassionate, intentional, and aligned with the philosophy I live by.

Yoga teaches us to embrace the fullness of life, to remain equanimous in the face of dualities like joy and sorrow. And yet, as I sit with my grief, I recognize how challenging it is to hold space for the pain while also choosing not to let it define me.

What Does Yoga Say About Suicide?

In times of loss, I turn to the wisdom of the Vedas, Upanishads, and yogic philosophy for understanding:
1. Ahimsa (Non-Harming):
• The yogic principle of ahimsa, or non-harming, extends to oneself. Suicide, seen through this lens, may conflict with ahimsa. However, yoga also teaches us to meet all beings—including ourselves and those who have left us—with deep compassion. Those who choose to end their lives often do so from a place of overwhelming suffering, not malice or weakness.
2. The Eternal Soul:
• The Bhagavad Gita reminds us that the soul is eternal, transcending the physical body. While suicide may leave karmic lessons unresolved, the soul’s journey continues, guided by divine grace. This perspective has offered me solace, helping me release judgment and hold my friend in love.
3. A Yogic Approach to Death:
• Some advanced yogis practice mahasamadhi, a conscious and intentional departure from the body after fulfilling their dharma. This is vastly different from suicide driven by despair. Still, both invite us to reflect on the sacredness of life and the interconnectedness of all beings.

Processing Grief Through Yoga

Grief is a journey, not a destination. Yoga provides tools to navigate this path with mindfulness, presence, and self-compassion. Here’s how I’m integrating my practice to process this loss:
1. Creating Space for Emotions:
• While I strive for equanimity, I also know the importance of allowing myself to feel. Suppressing grief can create blocks that hinder healing. I’ve set aside intentional time to reflect, cry, and honor my friend’s memory without letting it consume my day-to-day life.
2. Practicing Loving-Kindness Meditation:
• I’ve turned to metta (loving-kindness) meditation, offering peace to my friend’s soul and to myself:
• May you be free from suffering. May you find peace. May you know love.
3. Honoring Her Spirit Through Yoga:
• Each day, I dedicate my practice to her, sending love and light to her soul. This might be through chanting, pranayama, or simply holding her in my heart during meditation.
4. Chanting for Healing:
• The mantra Om Shanti Shanti Shanti has been a balm for my soul. It invokes peace for myself, for my friend, and for all beings.

Integrating Grief Into My Yoga Therapy Practice

This loss has deepened my commitment to my studies in yoga therapy and mental health. As a future yoga therapist and mental health technician, I see grief as a universal experience that can either isolate us or connect us. My intention is to process this loss fully, so I can hold space for others walking similar paths.

Through this journey, I’m learning:
• To embrace impermanence: Life is fleeting, but love endures.
• To cultivate compassion: Understanding my friend’s choice without judgment allows me to approach others with greater empathy.
• To hold space for healing: Grief is not something to “fix” but a process to honor.

A Message to Others Grieving

If you’re navigating a loss like this, know that you are not alone. Yoga teaches us to observe our emotions without becoming attached to them. This doesn’t mean suppressing your grief—it means holding it gently, like a wave that will eventually recede.

Give yourself permission to feel, to heal, and to remember your loved one in ways that honor their spirit and your own well-being. Seek support from your community, whether through yoga, therapy, or a trusted circle of friends. I will also be seeking professional therapy beyond my own schooling and education.

Closing Thoughts

My friend’s passing has left an ache in my heart, but it has also reminded me of the sacredness of life. Yoga offers me a way to navigate this grief—not by bypassing it, but by moving through it with presence and compassion.

To those walking this path of loss, I see you. I honor your journey. And I offer you this reflection in the hope that it brings you some peace.

May we all find the courage to face life’s challenges with grace and love.
May we all know that we are never truly alone.

In loving memory of my friend.